Wednesday, March 24, 2010

This post may or may not bore you to DEATH...Probably.

I'm considering [trying to] going back to weighing myself once a week again. I did that for a little while...but it drove me insane. I couldn't stand not knowing, at all times. But because we're women (well, most of us...No male discrimination from me!), our weight is bound to fluctuate here and there, some of us experiencing it more than others. There are a few of us, it would seem *cough* Sottile! *cough* who can see a pretty consistent drop from day to day, from morning to evening... Lol, you KNOW I adore you, girl. ;) I just know that with MY body, I can wake up at 135, drink a couple glasses of water and have a slice of apple, and weigh in at 140 by 6 PM. I'm serious. It's insane.

This is why I'm thinking it would be best for my sanity to weigh only once or twice a week, and then average that, maybe, after a month, to assess my progress. I realize this is an entirely radical idea, and that it very well could fail, falling flat on its face before I even give it a fair chance, just because I'm ridiculously impatient and tend to jump to conclusions FAR too quickly in any/every situation. Example: "Wait...what? 136.8?? OMG, I am getting fucking obese, I had better just give up now and eat a fucking smorgasbord of donuts, cinnamon rolls, and kolaches for breakfast because all hope is CERTAINLY lost, if I restricted and still GAINED..."

ComPLETEly illogical, yes. That's me, in the shell of a nut. And you know? I'm okay with it. It's just the way I roll. Cinnamon style.


Umm...what else... So yes, I consumed approximately 650 calories this morning for breakfast alone. I then decided, after having worn my heart rate monitoring chest belt thingie since 7 AM and seeing that I'd already burned 587 by 11 AM, that I can still come out ahead by the end of the day, as long as I don't continue to eat like it's my job. I have to be VERY careful. As you ALL know, a bad start to any day can very quickly and very easily turn into a day-long binge fest, should you let it. I have to keep in mind my goals, my strength, the ability to resist and starve and how WONDERFUL it feels to be hungry and dizzy and lightheaded in my perfect emptiness. Like a balloon...except not a big, round fat balloon. More like one of those long skinny ones they use at kids' birthday parties to make weiner dogs and stuff.

Okay, so that's not a very flattering thought, either. Not at least when I'm comparing MYSELF to it.

And I can't help but share *these* with you now, since I found them in my image search and found them riotously entertaining:

Soooooo... odd...

SOOOOooooOOOO cute!!!
Moving on...

Moving on to what, though? I mean, honestly? All of the things that are jumbling around and bouncing in circles in my head seem so trite and boring and mundane...I feel like I haven't been reading nearly enough of your postings, my lovelies. I shall go do that now. I will tell you, though, that your comments totally make my day, every day. Seriously. I check my email all excitedly, awaiting new comments, like a five-year-old running down the stairs on Christmas morning (except that we never had stairs cuz we always lived in a trailer or something, I can pretend and SO CAN YOU! :P)

I wanted to take a picture for you today, but I probably look like trash. You wanna see anyway? Hmm... Lemme see if I can't get one. You can see how I look without a shower, hastily applied makeup thrown on my face, all after walking through the rain for fifteen minutes on my way to a class that starts too early for a mommy who can't get a certain toddler from waking her up multiple times for no apparent reason... I wince at the run-on-iness of that sentence...Bad English major, Bad P.D.! :P

And there you have it. That's me. RIGHT NOW. Ha...That's me wanting a bagel cuz I'm sitting RIGHT outside the stupid bagel shop at school. Highly suggestible. Good thing my stomach is so angry with me for eating earlier that it's fighting my mind with a heavy feeling of nausea. Take that, fucking Binge Monster!



  1. I'm heading out of the door right now, so I couldn't even properly read through your post - I just looked at the pictures.

    That hot-dog one made me laugh - like seriously.
    Sooo cute, albeit slightly disturbing.

    And despite no shower, hasty make-up and rain, I think you look stunning in that picture, especially considering the aforementioned conditions!

    Gorgeous eyes, and lips, and what I believe to be part of a gorgeous tattoo visible on your left shoulder?

    Also, I just read your comment on my insomnia post - and seriously, I am speechless on how sweet it was, and how amazing and lovely and nice of you!

    Really gotta go now, so I can't even say enough about it, but seriously - you are one amazing human being! <3

    (Please excuse any possible spelling mistakes, being in a hurry 'an all.)

  2. That sausage dog is the.cutest.thing.EVER.

    Also watch out with weighing yourself, it's such a viscous cycle, it's a great habit to get out of!


  3. Hey there! I think you look gorgeous :)

    And weight fluctuates so much, it's almost impossible to tell what any gain or drop is going to mean a day from now or a week from now. And for me, it just turns into a nasty cycle, where I need to run jump on the scale every five minutes.

    I love your pictures--they cracked me up!

    Take care of yourself.

  4. Oh sweet Jesus.
    I just laughed so hard I peed a little.
    (No, not really. But if that ever happened to me, it would have been right then.)
    First of all, your writing is the perfect example of "quick with and sharp tongue." I love it.
    Don't get discouraged about breakfast! You still have time to fix things. I almost finished off that piece of cheesecake earlier.. Then I threw it away.
    As wasteful as that is, it's actually a good avoidance technique.
    You know, just so you know.
    (haha, that sounded ridiculous.)
    Also, you're very pretty. Nice ankh.

  5. Looking lovely dear <3 Your arms are amazing! :D

    And yeah I can't even have a scale in the house or I'll turn into a huge pile of failure from obsessively checking it every hour.

    Good job resisting the bagels!!!! Stay strong and inspiring, I know you will :)


  6. I want that puppy...
    My weight jumps up and down all throughout the day, and then drops down (somehow) at night. It's odd. But I love waking up at 130 when I went to bed at 134.
    Alllllllllllllllso, I think you're gorgeous <3
    :)Stay strong, girlie.
    xoxox alisson

  7. I hear you with the binge monster. Had a run-in with him today. This afternoon, actually. This morning was better.

    Nice pic! I wish I were brave enough to post current pics. I look and feel like crap these days. Kids'll do that to you. Wear you out so you have no energy for anything else.

    Thanks for your awesomely funny and entertaining entry! You always make me smile.