And...we're back.
Babygirl's finally down for the night, my uncle is in his room leaving me alone, and I'm sitting out in the cold dining room typing away with my trusty tea, sipping my hunger away. Kind of. Not really. But I like to pretend it helps. Sometimes *that* works.
So I wanna tell you all about my day, but firstly I'd like to thank ya'll again for being so lovely. :) I honestly don't care how lame this is, but... My quality of life and state of mental health (and overall sense of well-being) were just about total SHIT before I found you girls. Seriously. I am so utterly and eternally grateful for all of you; I don't know where I'd be without you. You make this life more than just bearable, beyond merely tolerable...You make it okay for me to be the way I am, and help me see beyond the misery of it all...You've convinced me that while it may consume me, this disorder does *not* define me, and for that I can never thank you enough.
All the same, I'm sure I'll keep trying to find new and interesting ways to thank you... :P
Oh, and Della: As of late, I've actually had more trouble getting to sleep than doing much of anything else. Even resisting food is often easier than falling asleep. I blame it on the fact that I've gotten much more strict with myself concerning eating past 6 or 7, AND I've added like 200% MORE green tea and coffee to my diet than previously... Now you've got me trying to figure out what the best part of my day actually *is*... I'd say morning. I wake up so empty and lovely and thin, and my belly's flat and I get to weigh myself...Always look forward to that, even if I'm scared of what it'll tell me. Then I get to go work out and that's always a highlight. So yeah. There's your answer. :P
Umm...Let's see. Oh. The title of this blog. "Are you ready for this?" Pictures. Yes. The new ones. The ones from this morning. I'm ready to post them...I'm just hoping not to shock anyone into disbelief or any other emotion as to how/why I'd do such a thing.
Thing is, as bothered as I am about my many, many flaws, I find that, for some reason, posting them online is really a rather easy thing for me to do. Perhaps too easy. I'm very proud of my progress thusfar, and I place high value on feedback from others who're going through similar experiences as myself...maybe that's what it is. I'm not afraid of ridicule. I could care less. I'll take it if it comes, but honestly, I'm not expecting it. I feel such a need to share all of myself with you guys... Is that naive of me? Foolish? Meh. Maybe. Do I care? Apparently not.
Geez...this post is getting long. I don't feel like I could describe to you my whole day and all that it held without totally boring you out of your pretty little minds. Maybe I'll save all that shopping nonsense for later. Let's sum up the important parts and then I'll post that puppies and that'll be that. I've got some blog-readin' to do!!! ;)
Calories consumed: approximately 750 (approximate because I don't know how many calories were in the squid and shrimp salad I nibbled on today...but I guessed high when I factored this in...)
Calories burned (cardio): 200. This, obviously, doesn't include the number I burned while traipsing about the malls all day (should have worn my watch and chestbelt and then I would've totally known!)
Not a bad day at all, in my eyes. Not for me, anyway. :P Guess we'll find out tomorrow morning when it comes time to weigh again. Yay?
Pictures!! Ahh! So this is me at 134ish. 5'6 and a half. FATNESS. Yes. But I will be 110 one day and THEN...then I'll show you teh hawtness. ;)
=)
ReplyDeleteYou're goin to be smokin hott @ 110!! I love your ribs!! I can't wait to see my own.
I think for me, posting my pics online scares me because I don't think I could ever get them down.. Plus the fear of being found out and whatnot..
xo
It's the same for me.Iv been tryin to figure out how show everyone the songs I recorded but havnt figured out how to do it yet...
ReplyDeleteBut your pics looking amazing! You've truly come a long way, probably more than you think.
Xx. Lillie
Lookin' good!
ReplyDeleteI am jealous of your hot, post-baby body. I hope that I can bounce back like you did (that is, if I ever have a family...lookin' doubtful),
Thanks for posting these!
Your ribs look like they were carved by an ice-pick!!
ReplyDeleteOk, that sounds less complimentary than it did in my head, but trust me, that is a compliment.
our bodies are statistically about the same, im 5'6 and a half, and 134lbs last i checked... but i look fatter than you... i like your body loads better. this is so unfair :P
ReplyDeleteyou look great though, you and i both can't wait to be 110!! stay strong, we're edging closer